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Volume 31

An Easy Way To Love What You Dislike

Like everyone else, you are tested on the love you have on a daily basis through people, situations or things involving friends, family or loved ones. We may even get stuck at this point, unable to move forward in life.

When this happens, here’s what you can do.

Set The Intention To Love


Set your intention to love. Set this intention with your body, mind and soul. It is as if you are setting up a GPS to align your body, mind and soul to your final destination.

Rate yourself from 0 to 10 (0 – Hate, 10 – Love), while you are setting your intention.

Affirm in your heart or verbalize: “I choose to love (name of person/ situation/ thing)”.

You may feel uncomfortable, like you are faking, lying to yourself or forcing yourself to love, or you don’t even feel to love. You may also feel as if there is a gap between your current reality and your intention.

This is okay. Again, this step sets the intention to love, to inform our body, mind and soul that love is your destination.

The intention is meant to create an awareness within you: where you are now and where you intend to be. This becomes a golden opportunity to love slowly, but surely.


After you have set your intention with the rating, the next step is to take action. Action or actions that enable you to love at a “10”.

Again, take your time. Always remember that your final goal is to love. To check your progress, you may repeat Step 1 every time you take your action.

Here are some actions you can take to love:

  • Forgive and accept the person/ situation/ thing.
  • Try to understand the person/ situation/ thing from different perspectives.
  • Get a second opinion from someone you trust.
  • Take this opportunity to understand yourself more: Why can’t you bring yourself to love?

Try asking yourself the following questions. These questions could help you choose love:

  • What’s stopping me to love?
  • What am I afraid of if I love?
  • What will I lose if I love?
  • Am I willing to change?

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Loving In Gratitude

Another way to love what you dislike is to be grateful. Gratitude is the best way to mellow our ego or our constant mind reasoning. It is also the easiest way to help us open our hearts and love again.

  1. Be seated at a place that you can feel safe and relaxed. Close your eyes and focus on breathing in and out through your nostrils. Feel the air flow into your belly as you breathe in and feel the air flow out through your nostrils as you breathe out. Repeat 5 to 10 times.
  2. Imagine the subject that you dislike. Start paying attention to your feelings. You will start to feel all the negative emotions that are stored in your heart. Your mind may start commenting or criticizing. The positive side of you may also appear to tell you that you should not feel or think negatively. Allow yourself to be an observer.
  3. Observe and slowly start to acknowledge all your feelings and thoughts. Gently breathe out all the negative feelings and thoughts.
  4. Continue to breathe out until you are ready to say, “thank you” to the subject. Say it sincerely and whole-heartedly.
  5. If you do it right, you may feel a sense of gratitude flowing from your heart. This is the time where you can truly love the subject through gratitude. You can say to the subject, “I love you, thank you”.
  6. Enjoy this gratitude and love. Take your time and once you are ready, slowly open your eyes with a great smile.

Remember that practice makes perfect. Keep practicing and you eventually will and can love fully, and unconditionally.

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Low Sheau Shy is a Life Clarity Specialist and certified meditation instructor. Previously, she lived in fear and felt completely lost. That changed in 2009 when she started her self-discovery journey. She is now on a mission to help others regain clarity, full trust and confidence in life. She believes that a compassionate world starts from a loving individual. Since 2011, she’s been living her passion to inspire, empower and transform lives through mindfulness meditations, healing sessions and other self-development work. Low Sheau Shy can be contacted at