LOVE IS MORE THAN AN EMOTION

“Love is blind”, goes that old saying. I can only nod in agreement as a thought crosses my mind – you would have to be when it comes to families.

So what is love when it comes to family members? We already know it’s not always like those feel-good movies where everything is always a laugh or ends rosy. Well, I believe that:

• Love is not wanting to constantly change others

With those your age, or older, forget about them constantly conforming to your ideas of what’s right or wrong. You think you’re always right, don’t you? So do I. And so do they.

We all see the world through our own special glasses. These are made up of our own experiences and bias.

There’s this family quote that goes, “Parents were the only ones obligated to love you; from the rest of the world you had to earn it,” by Ann Brashares.

I’m going to change that “Parents” in the quote to “Family”. Simply because it’s true.

I’m learning to accept family for who they are. Well, most of the time, anyway. This doesn’t mean that I don’t stand up for myself. On the contrary. Love yourself and them enough to do what’s right at the right time.

• Love is releasing all expectations

Let’s move on to younger family members.

At one time, I used to be fairly strict with some of my nieces and nephews. I expected them to behave in a certain way and was way too generous with unnecessary advice.

Imposing too many expectations stresses family members out. And it certainly doesn’t improve relationships with them. Trust me, I learnt that the hard way.

Instead, let them be who they are. Love them enough to allow them to experiment. They’ll come to you if they really need help.

• Love means always being there

No matter what happens, if there’s a problem, you need to do what you can to help family. Preferably without the “I told you so” statements. Well, not at the point of crisis anyway!

My family was there for me when I went through two surgeries. Even though it was my own negligence and emotions that had created both of them. And I hadn’t been the most wonderful person 24/7 to them either.

Loving your family isn’t just confined to an emotion. Your thoughts and actions come into play too. What’s your definition of family love? How do you love your family?

Family Love Quotes “In family life, love is the oil that eases friction, the cement that binds closer together, and the music that brings harmony.” ~ Eva Burrows “Families are the compass that guides us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.” ~ Brad Henry