Volume 9

“How Could You Do This To Me?”

What do you do when your spouse or partner has an affair?

I have my own real-life story relating to this experience. When you first find out, you may have many questions racing through your mind… “How could the person do this to me? How long has this affair been going on”?

Now try to put a pause to all these thoughts. Just tell yourself and your mind that you will attend to them later. All these thoughts are not helping you in any way. Believe me, I know how that feels.

I Know It’s Hard For You To Believe…But Everything DOES Happen For A Reason

Just for a moment, take my hand and believe that everything happens for a reason.

Believe that you will find a way out, and start to focus on yourself instead of your spouse and the betrayal.

Focus just for a moment to heal your heart and emotions, and then you will gain more peace and love in your heart.

Based on my personal experience, let me share a few steps to heal yourself after discovering an extra-marital affair.


  1. Connect With Yourself

Usually after discovering an affair, a lot of people will experience confused thoughts and emotions. Every morning before starting your day, take a few minutes to be silent. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.

Feel your heart and give yourself permission to feel your emotions. Acknowledge all the feelings or emotions that may surface. Feelings such as shock, sadness, insecurity, fear and anger are absolutely normal.

Have courage by allowing the emotions to run through you. Let your feelings out and never suppress them, as these emotions are negative energy that must be released. The more you face your emotions, the more courageous you become.

If it makes you feel better to release the emotions physically, you may choose to shout and scream at the top of your lungs at the beach or an isolated spot.

Never take out your unresolved emotions on others, and this includes your spouse. Everything happens for a reason, even if you cannot believe it now.

As you become stable emotionally, you will be able to accept what is happening in your relationship. I have gone through them and emerged stronger.

want to try the rest of  the steps? Purchase volume 9, here to finish reading You Can Love Again !

Janine Lee is the author of My Journey Towards Light, in which she shares her life-transforming experiences and spiritual learning from her marital challenges. Her healing journey with the power of unconditional love has inspired her to teach and heal others, touching and transforming countless lives. After 8 years of spiritual practice and overcoming numerous challenges in her life, Janine now brings deep insights to the heart of her clients with her essence of unconditional love. Reach out to Janine at